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The Hermit as Feelings in Love & Relationships: Upright & Reversed

When The Hermit appears in a tarot reading concerning love and relationships, it beckons us into the quiet, reflective spaces of our hearts. Known for its themes of solitude, introspection, and the pursuit of inner wisdom, The Hermit’s presence in matters of the heart may seem perplexing at first.

However, understanding the nuanced messages this Major Arcana card holds can offer profound insights into the emotional dynamics of your romantic life. This guide explores The Hermit as feelings in love and relationships, providing clarity on its significance and guidance on navigating its teachings.

Lets talk about:
🌕 Quick Basics: The Hermit in Love
🌔 The Hermit as Feelings in Love: Upright
🌓 The Hermit as Feelings in Love: Reversed
🌒 The Hermit as Feelings for an Ex
🌑 FAQs

Quick Basics: The Hermit in Love

The Hermit stands alone, lantern in hand, illuminating the path to inner knowledge and spiritual truth. This figure’s journey is one of solitude, not out of loneliness but as a deliberate quest for deeper understanding and personal integrity.

In the context of love and relationships, The Hermit’s appearance suggests a period of introspection may be necessary, either to contemplate the nature of a relationship or to reconnect with one’s own values and desires.

The Hermit as Feelings in Love: Upright

Let’s run through the significant meanings behind receiving an upright Hermit in this context.

💜 Seeking Deeper Connection

The Hermit in an upright position signifies a desire for a deeper, more meaningful connection. It suggests that superficial interactions are no longer satisfying and that both or one of the partners is seeking a relationship with a strong spiritual or intellectual foundation.

Advice: Cultivate spaces for deep, meaningful conversations with your partner. Share your inner thoughts, fears, and hopes to foster intimacy.

💜 Need for Personal Space

The appearance of The Hermit may also indicate a need for personal space within the relationship. This isn’t about distancing but about honoring each individual’s need for solitude as a way to nurture personal growth and self-understanding.

Advice: Respect each other’s need for alone time. Recognize that personal growth contributes to a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

💜 Reflection on Relationship Dynamics

This card advises taking a step back to reflect on the current state of the relationship. It’s a call to evaluate whether the partnership aligns with your deepest values and supports your spiritual growth.

Advice: Use this time of reflection to honestly assess the health and direction of the relationship. Consider whether adjustments are needed to realign with each other’s goals and needs.

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The Hermit as Feelings in Love: Reversed

Let’s run through the significant meanings behind receiving a reversed Hermit in this context.

➡️ Isolation and Loneliness

When reversed, The Hermit may point to feelings of isolation or loneliness within the relationship. It can indicate that one or both partners feel disconnected from each other, struggling to share their inner worlds.

Advice: Open up about feelings of loneliness or disconnection. Seek ways to bridge the emotional gap, perhaps with the help of a counselor or mediator.

➡️ Fear of Intimacy

The Hermit reversed can also reveal a fear of intimacy, where the protective solitude has turned into a barrier against vulnerability and closeness.

Advice: Address fears of intimacy by gently challenging your own barriers. Small steps towards vulnerability can lead to significant breakthroughs in trust and connection.

➡️ Over-Reliance on Self

This position may highlight an over-reliance on self to the exclusion of seeking support or companionship from others, suggesting a possible imbalance between independence and interdependence in the relationship.

Advice: Acknowledge the strength in vulnerability and the value of sharing life’s journey with someone else. Consider areas where you can open up and allow for mutual support.

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The Hermit as Feelings for an Ex

When The Hermit appears in a tarot reading concerning feelings for an ex, it suggests a phase of introspection and reflection on the past relationship.

This card embodies the journey inward, indicating that one or both individuals are contemplating the lessons learned and wisdom gained from the experience.

It’s not about harboring residual feelings of longing or regret but rather about understanding the deeper implications of the relationship’s end on a personal growth level.

The Hermit’s appearance can signify that someone is using this period of solitude to heal and to find peace with the past. It represents a solitary journey to rediscover one’s own light and path, independent of the relationship that once was.

This card hints at a need for closure, not necessarily to rekindle the relationship but to acknowledge the role it played in one’s life and how it has contributed to one’s development.


Here are five FAQs that delve deeper into the nuances of The Hermit’s energy in love and relationships, focusing on areas not previously covered.

1. How can The Hermit guide us to find love if we’re single?

The Hermit encourages singles to use this time for self-reflection and to understand their own needs and desires in a relationship deeply. It’s a reminder that finding love starts with knowing oneself and being clear about what you seek in a partner. Embrace solitude to build a strong foundation of self-love and clarity, making you more prepared for a relationship that aligns with your true self.

2. What does The Hermit suggest about maintaining independence in a relationship?

The Hermit highlights the importance of maintaining your individuality and independence within a relationship. It suggests creating a balance where both partners support each other’s personal growth and journeys. Cultivating personal hobbies, interests, and friendships outside the relationship can enrich your bond and prevent co-dependency.

3. Can The Hermit indicate a need for a relationship break or timeout?

Yes, The Hermit can sometimes suggest that taking a break or timeout from the relationship could be beneficial. This period apart can allow both individuals to reflect on their feelings, reassess their needs, and gain clarity about the future of the relationship. It’s crucial, however, to approach this conversation with sensitivity and to set clear intentions and boundaries for the break.

4. How does The Hermit reflect on the role of spiritual or personal beliefs in a relationship?

The Hermit emphasizes the significance of shared or respected spiritual and personal beliefs in deepening a relationship’s connection. It advises discussing your beliefs and values early on and finding common ground or mutual respect for your differences. A relationship that honors each partner’s spiritual journey can offer a more profound sense of unity and understanding.

5. What practical steps can we take to embody The Hermit’s advice in our love life?

To embody The Hermit’s advice, start by dedicating time for personal reflection and meditation to understand your emotional and spiritual needs. Communicate your findings and needs clearly with your partner or potential partners. Establish routines or rituals that honor both your need for personal space and your desire for connection, such as regular solo days or couple’s meditation sessions. Engaging in activities that foster personal growth, like retreats or workshops, can also be beneficial.

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Last Thoughts

The Hermit as feelings in love and relationships calls for introspection, solitude, and the pursuit of deeper connections, whether with oneself or with a partner.

It reminds us that true intimacy is built on the foundation of self-awareness and mutual respect for each individual’s journey.

By embracing the lessons of The Hermit, you can navigate the path to more meaningful and spiritually fulfilling relationships.